Breathe Fresh Air

My mother tells the story of her death. She was an infant. It was 1936 or 37. She was quite ill and apparently died. The doctor pronounced her dead. Her eldest brother came in the room and picked her up and brought her to an open window and held her in the cold, fresh air. She revived.

I am almost sure you know what my next words will be....FRESH AIR CAN REVIVE YOU, TOO. I know there are times when we need a miracle. My mother needed a miracle and she was given one both through her brother and the fresh air she breathed. I know we have science on our side if we recount the merits of fresh air, but it is even beyond scientific. It is spiritual. We need fresh air to fill our lungs, feed our cells and give life to our bodies and minds.

I believe we do go spiritually stale. We have busy lives and we attend to immediate needs of ourselves and our families. This often leads to neglect of our health and our minds. I heard a woman on a talk show yesterday speak these words when she was diagnosed with cancer, “I don't have time for this.” Isn't that true? The poor woman was so busy participating in life that she didn't have time to care for her own body. Don't let that happen to yourself, friend. Care for yourself each and every day so that you can reduce the prospect of cancer and other illnesses. I believe we can.

Breathing in fresh air...really breathing it...for a healthy length of time is essential to our lives. It is our sustenance. It is needed above all other needs. First and foremost....we need fresh air.

Step outside today and breathe. Breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth and do it a lot of times! Raise your little face to the sky and let the universe see you! Whatever is on your plate today....break it up...step outside...excuse yourself....and sneak a breath! Instead of a bathroom break, take a BREATHE break. A BB! Let fresh air fill you and heal you.


Take Good Care Today.

Rise Above It

The world is suffering from a lack of joy. For some reason humans focus on the negative and do not stress the positive. The news, the talk around the water cooler...all are negative. It can be so hard to keep up your positivity when you are constantly exposed to negative vibes. Without realizing it, we can be pulled down into another's black hole of misery.


It takes a concerted effort to rise above negativity. One must put themselves out there as a fresh light to the world. As I write this, it is 5:50 on a Wednesday morning. It is cold outside and dark. Joy seems the farthest thing from my mind. I am still waking up, second cup of coffee...but still, not feeling overly joyful. However, I know soon it will be light, there is the promise of sunshine and warmer weather, and I can feel joy emerging in my heart. You must as well.


If it means pushing yourself into joy, then do it. Music helps, a good diet helps, sleep is a must! But more than that, you must dedicate yourself to finding your own joy and your happy heart. If you are struggling here are a few ideas that might help:


~Get out whatever religious text that you adhere to and read
~Move your body!
~Shower and put on something you feel beautiful in
~Plan out your day on paper....you special dinner, a walk in the sunshine
~Prepare for the weekend
~Write a love note
~Call your children or hug them if they still live with you~
~Call your mother and tell her you love her :) - or a friend
~Cuddle and kiss your dog
~Meditate
~Look in the mirror and tell yourself affirmations
~Begin a gratitude list


Joy can be made. A young girl told me yesterday that her life was ruined. I immediately tried to help her find her joy. We need to keep in mind that no thing and no one can ruin us. We survive much and emerge with joy...over and over. It is a practice. A way of life. It is inside us and exciting. We are in control and can change. If people once knew us as negative and downcast...they will relearn us as happy and positive.

They say the simple act of smiling can actually change your mood. Try it today!


Take Good Care Today!

It's Not You, It's Your Clothes

Listen ladies. If you are hung up on the sizes of clothes you wear, let it go. If we are to realize how beautifully perfect our bodies are, we need to dress them in clothing that fits, no matter the size of that clothing.

Here you are, in a store and you are trying on a piece of clothing that just doesn't fit, or doesn't look right. You immediately think it is YOUR fault that the item doesn't fit. You feel as if your body is wrong in some way because the item doesn't look good on you. Well, guess what? It isn't you. It is the clothing!

Clothing manufacturers try to make a hit when they design, but it is impossible to design a pair of jeans, per-say, that fit each and every woman the same. You may weigh the same and be the same height as another, but your bodies are shaped individually and there is no way a company can make something in mass quantity that will fit you both correctly. So, stop blaming yourself.


For example, you must try on many, many pairs of jeans to find the right one that is the best for your shape. Do not look at sizes. That is just silly. Once you know a company, you can trust their sizing and you will be a able to purchase that size a little more blindly knowing it will fit you. Some companies will create jeans specifically for you if you want that. JC Penney has a place on their website where you can take your own measurements and they will design a pair of jeans for you for about $100. Believe it or not, a good jean will cost. There is a brand called, Not Your Daughter's Jeans, that I think is great. I am thrilled that they have put a little stretch in jeans over the past decade. I was not a fan of jeans before this as I have an hour-glass shape and not many manufacturers can design a jean that has a 10 inch difference between the hips and waist! But, folks, that's the reality of a woman's body!


We do not fit into molds. We each have an individual designer body. We can't rely on companies to know our measurements. Do NOT take this personally when you go shopping. Dress yourself in clothing that fits and stop looking at tags. Many of us take away self-esteem issues when we look at tags. Keep healthy, feed your body, do your best to stay in shape and dress yourself. Have fun with clothes, let them show who you are. Don't cram into things that aren't your size and don't swim either. This is the only body you have.


Take Good Care Today.   

You Are Your Safe Place

When it comes down to the nitty gritty, YOU are your safe place. You are your best friend, your own lover, mother, sister, child. YOU are all you have in this world – REALLY. There was a time...actually...most of my life...that this scared the heck out of me. I surely couldn't be enough for myself! How could I meet ALL of my own needs? I would be nothing without those whom I love! Although there are aspects of these statements that scare me and hurt me, they actually are pretty true.


I have spent most of my life depending on others to make me whole and this cannot happen. Gosh, I am pretty sure, after a lot of introspection, I got married at 19 in order to have what I thought was security. As it turns out: no one can give you security. I am not really sure if there is true security on this earth...other than the security of being your own safe place.

You and only you, I believe, (me and only me) can be there for yourself. You are safe with yourself. You can guide yourself, love yourself and meet your own needs like no other person can. You know yourself. You 'GET' yourself. You are safe with YOU. Trust You. Be there for YOU. Take CARE of YOU. Respect yourself enough to realize that you have made it this far on this planet and you are going to be okay. Fear need not factor in. Only sensible thoughts and caring gestures need happen for yourself and to yourself. You are safe in your own arms.


When you know this and can rest in this, you suddenly appreciate others more. You adore that another has chosen to spend his life with you. You are thrilled to be around family when you have no expectations from them. You meet your own inner needs and they are off the hook.


How you meet those needs is up to you. Whether you are safe inside your own head and heart or rely on God to help you, you find your own safety. But, it involves you and only you or you and God.

You know I am not saying that others are not there for you. You get that, right? They are and will be. You are loved and others will pick you up if you fall. However, when it comes down to your inner safety, growth, security and love: YOU ARE IT, BABE! Enjoy your own self. It's a safe place.


Take Good Care Today!

Challenge How You've Always Thought

Have you been clinging to certain systems of belief for no other reason than it hasn't occurred to you to question your own way of thinking? I have and I believe it is high time we all looked inside of ourselves and took a look at our preconceived notions, evaluate them, and adjust them if necessary.

What brings me to this you ask? I am able to share with you a portion of what has brought me to this spot in life. I often will attempt to handle a situation the same way I've handled it time
after time and I always get the same result. This result is usually a temporary fix, enough to make me think my way is the correct answer in how to handle certain situations. However, this very small band-aid-of-a-fix is actually a direct miss. Oh, it hit for a minute, long enough to appear a fix, but indeed, it diverted the minute I wasn't looking, and the problem surfaces soon after.

I believe this principle can be applied to many of our issues and problems in life. We develop a system of beliefs or a mechanism for a fast fix. We live busy lives and we rather not have to delve into actually fixing issues, so we settle and settle and settle for a minute-fix...a day-fix....a month-fix. We don't realize at the time that it is this. We feel fixed. So we assume we are. However, because we haven't fully questioned our ways or our judgments, we end up back at square one. Interestingly, we are willing to be back at square one over and over and over. We'll do anything to avoid actually facing our issue and REALLY applying what it takes to fix it. We take the easy way out.

The only problem is, adding all attempts together, this is never the easy way. It ends up the long, hard, painful way. We don't take the time to truly take care of things once and for all. If we did, we'd face it no longer and be on our way to a happier, freer life.  I believe this is because we lack knowledge and know-how.  If we were equipped with these, we might make better decisions.  However, we can't do that unless we question our ways.

I wish I were not a 50 year-old-woman telling you this. I wish this occurred to me in my 20's. However, if it did, it did not stick. Help yourself today and heed my experienced words. You know you have an issue that needs a real fix and not a temporary, fake one. Take the time to learn what needs to be learned. Don't 'easy way out' of it. You'll be glad you did the work.


Take Good Care Today.

Patience is a Virtue!

This being true, I must be the most virtuous person alive. If you need to work on your patience may I suggest teaching 12-14 year olds on a daily basis? This will either take you to the funny farm or create in you a calm patience that seeps deep into your being. Some of us are pushed into patience and some come to it naturally. Others, I am sure, never quite learn the art.

I wasn't always patient. In fact, I don't think I had a lot of patience at all for years. I would have patience for some things, but not for others. My mother is a VERY patient person. But, she is not type A personality like I am. Still, as I grow, I find more patience every day.

What are we really in a rush for anyway? The sun will come up tomorrow one way or another, so what is the difference? Life will go on whether we've fit every single event into our week that we had planned. The planets will remain in orbit if we're 5 minutes late to a meeting. Seasons will continue to change while we're waiting for someone to finish her sentence or meet our expectation. Really and true, we can't force much to happen, so why not settle back and practice patience.

As an inexperienced teacher, years ago, I once told a much older colleague that I was struggling with the students' behavior and getting upset every day. I still remember her response. “Why would you do that to yourself?” she said. Why, indeed? I didn't know why. Then and there I decided I had to go to my 'Zen' place and calm the heck down. I was a MUCH happier person and a more effective teacher. Very rarely do I get worked up over something these days. I just go with the flow. I'm happy to be alive and participate in other's lives. Life is good. Life has its own pace. I can't alter that.

Be patient, my friend. It is a better way to live!

Take Good Care Today!

Put Your Best Foot Forward

Not every day is going to be something you feel like participating in. I get that. Mine are the cold, windy, dark days of winter...and it isn't the whole day, it is going out in the morning darkness or coming home in the cold darkness. If I could be teleported from one inside building to the next, I 
would be happy. But, it can often take all that I have to put it together to face a miserable day.

What I prefer is to awaken with the warm breezes of summer and the birds chirping. I adore getting up on those days! I can't stand to stay in bed! I want to join forces with the earth's energies and melt into the day on those days. Mid-winter Monday a.m.....NADA. Those are the days that I find distasteful to enter into.

However, as a family member of mine often says, “Any day above ground is a good one.” With this in mind, we have no other option but to put our best foot forward to marry ourselves to the day before us.

Putting our best foot forward takes effort but is not unrewarded. What I do is to find some fabulous clothing to spend the day in. I bring some yummy food to munch and a delicious drink or two. I try to find joy in the little things that might make the day a bit better. I listen to music that makes my heart sing, and illuminate my atmosphere with comforting lighting. Basically, I am good to myself.  I offer myself the kindness and the comfort to help jump start myself into my day.

 The day will come into itself with much more ease if you put your best foot forward. People will look at you and wonder how you manage to be positive, amazing and smart-looking all while the rest of the world is suffering from NOT putting their best foot forward. Perhaps you will encourage another to make the choice to change it up. 

 Sometimes, putting your best foot forward requires a little “fake it till you make it!”


Hope you can put that best foot forward today. You will notice the difference!


Take Good Care Today!

Love Your Peeps

Each one of us is given some people to love. These are ours. We aren't apt to break away from our people. We share our lives with them. Hopefully, we enjoy being with them. I want to remind us to LOVE them. Keep your peeps in your heart at all times and in doing so, the love you feel will come back to you, nourish and fulfill you.

Loving each one of our people may not always be easy. It often takes a concerted effort and a thorough decision backed up with closed eyes and mouth. We don't control any other person so it can be hard loving another without feeling a judgment once in awhile. But, though we are called to love these folks, we are not to run their lives. This is for them alone. Oh, we may WANT to say a word or two, but truly, it is not for us.

Of course, there are times our advice is summoned and on those occasions we may offer it. Even then we must be careful not to be too forthright with our ideas because each must choose his own path. When I am asked for advice, of course I give it--(obviously, I am full of it!)--but I try to give it in a broad sense and I try to speak from my experiences only, which is really all we each can do. I try not to assume or project anything. These are not easy to do.

When someone asks for help with a problem, we often think they are feeling the issue exactly how we would feel the issue and this is not always true. It might be, we are all a lot alike...but it is not totally this way as we all walk our own walk and have lived through very different circumstances. But, out of love we help each other.

To love others means heartache but it also means full joy. We think of each other all the time. While shopping, playing, walking-they come to mind. A tiny stone makes me think of one friend. A little earring brings my niece to mind. The sight of a little piglet makes me laugh as it is a living symbol of a friendship that has lasted a life-time. My heart is filled when I keep my family and friends near. Yes, they drive me nuts sometimes, but I love them beyond any measure and what I receive from that love is a fulfillment that can be found no where else.

Love your peeps. Give them a call. Send a little note. Write an email. Message them. They love you, too. We need the love.

Take Good Care Today.

Feel Good About Your Body

This can be a difficult task. We seem to never be satisfied with how we look. Our poor bodies take so much so much negativity from us. We are so unkind to the very vessel that gets us up and down the stairs, takes us on beautiful walks and holds our very existence. We criticize, over-exercise, over-eat, pick on, beat on, – you name it. We do it to our bodies. We just don't offer our bodies the respect they deserve.

If we could appreciate our bodies and care for them the way they require and deserve, wouldn't this be so much better? Nourishment for our bodies is scientific and precise but it isn't rocket science. Healthy eating plans are readily available. Potato Chips have never been good for the human being and I am not thinking they are ever going to be. But, we still choose them. We are lured to them by the nose and the eye and not by the need of proper nourishment.

It is the hardest thing to be kind to your body and not judge it against the standards of the world...or at least the American media. We are incredibly judgmental and we compare ourselves to what we see as the perfect model of the human female body. Truly, there is no perfect female body, except for the one you are in. Each body is perfect. We need to wake our society up and push against this perceived perfection that is stick thin and start putting our voices out there. We need to clearly protest that a woman's body is curvy and lovely. Some are thinner than others, but all are different and all are fine.

Yes, there is a point of being unhealthily overweight and each person knows where they are on scale. It is a personal choice and not subject to judgment. Let people be. Be your own woman and pay attention to your own body and no one else's. Care for it and love it and feed it what it needs. Say a hearty, “Thank You,” to it once in awhile. Pat yourself on the shoulder for getting to this point in your life. Pamper and preen. Bask in the sun. Curl up in comfy blankets. Go for long walks. Love your own body.

Take Good Care Today.

Take the Good From the Bad

Are you ever been embarrassed of yourself? Have you said something that came out wrong or was just not a good decision? I am guilty of this on a fairly regular basis. Sometimes it is nerves that makes me speak before I think, sometimes it is my exuberance for life. However it happens, one of two things can ensue. #1. I can beat the heck out of myself, worry for days, lose sleep....basically kick my own butt for a really long time. #2. I can acknowledge the fact that I said a booboo, tell myself to do better next time, and then forget it and move on.


#1. Happens a lot. I am sorry to say this. I kick my own butt for a ridiculously long time. I torture myself and create scenarios in my head. I convince myself that life as I know it is going to change for the worse. I can't be realistic and I worry, worry, worry.

What really is the sense of this worry? Will it change the fact that we've done something embarrassing? No, it will not. If this happens to you as it does me (and maybe it doesn't....but I have a feeling we're all more similar that not) please try to choose option #2. We are not perfect and our mouths do get ahead of us. It is the rare person who can always keep their mouth shut or not slip up with words. Of the thousands of words we say a day, surely some are going to come out slanted or cross-ways. We can't expect to never slip up. That is unrealistic.

I think what makes it hard is that we live in a society where everyone goes bazerk over everything! I mean people will sue someone over the slightest thing. I agree, we must be careful, but it would be nice if the world wasn't ready to jump on every misspoken word. We should try to look into a person's soul before we judge too quickly. People are basically good at heart and most often don't mean to infringe on another.

One of the Toltec Four Agreements is, “Be Impeccable With Your Word.” I try very hard to adhere to this, but I fail at times. When this happens....I try very hard to move over #1 and right into #2. I know I've screwed up and that my tongue has gone and done it again, but I try to immediately forgive myself. I am WAY too hard on myself. I know I am a loving and kind soul. I'll try better next time. I will think a little longer and harness those words next time. But will I ever get it right? No. I don't think so. I will, however, improve, and so will you.

Take Good Care Today.